At first, it was just natural. We lived in their house while we were looking for a new home, so every night was family dinner. Actually what I remember most was keeping my two cats locked upstairs in what used to be a playroom (now my mother's art studio) and our beloved 5:00 cocktail hour when my husband and my dad would both come home from work and we would meet in the kitchen for martinis and laughs about the day with our joyful toddler Zachary bouncing from one person's arms to the next.
Soon we were in our own home, with our daughter Maddie joining the family; my brother had moved to the area as well soon to start a family of his own. Family dinners were usually on Sunday nights. We chose places which were kid friendly. I remember that Chinese food was a favorite of ours. There was also a deli we loved. We had a pizza place we adored, and it was there, a few years later, having pizza and a great antipasto when we got the phone call that my niece Talia was born!
We meet and share the news the of the week. New jobs, new boyfriends and girlfriends (the kids, not the adults... don't worry!), house troubles. The snow. The rain. The hurricane. If the weather is terrible we meet for dinner. If the weather is great... we meet for dinner. We bring sad news, and we bring great news. Heavy news and frivolity. We laugh and we are sometimes loud. We sometimes change seats before dessert. We sing Happy Birthday in Hebrew. Jacob and Ben, the same age, would sword-fight with tooth-picks when they were little. Then, in the blink of an eye, they were already in the "sneak-texting" phase!
And before we knew it, our first was grown and off to college, and the reservation was for 10 and not 11 anymore. And more often than not, the kids had things to do, rehearsals, social engagements, homework. And just this September, the last grandchild, little Talia went to college. Family dinner is just six of us, my parents, my brother and his wife, my husband and me.
We went out to dinner last night.
My brother chose sushi, because it was his birthday... 5 days ago.
As we order I think about all the years of the family dinners. My husband isn't here because of work. The kids are all off, three are in college, two of mine are already through with school and on their own. October has been a rough month for me and I am somewhat pensive.
My parents are through with the menu and my sister-in-law and I are ready to order.
My brother pours some sake into his glass while we wait for the waitress.
He starts a story.
"When I was in London, sushi was very rare."
"Too bad," Dad says, not missing a beat, "because it should have been raw!"
While we are laughing over this I get a text. As impolite as it is, I secretly check my phone at the dinner table. It's a photo of my three kids.
They are having family dinner at my daughter's house tonight in Cambridge. They know I love a good selfie, so they sent it to me before they cleaned up the dishes.
I see they sent it to my husband who clumsily tries to send back a smiley but sends the angry face emoji by mistake.
I smile, and I hear myself laugh. I look up and see my brother has caught me "sneak-texting" on my phone. I slip it back in my pocket.
Surrounded by love, I get back to the family dinner. (Insert happy emoji here.)
