I recently hit 5,300 hits on my blog.
Blog.
Silly word isn't it? It's from the combined word "web-log."
I'm frequently asked what I write about.
That's a tricky one. (I'd like to just say... "Go read the blog!")
If I say I write about myself I sound narcissistic.
I was told (by my kids) not to have one of those lame blogs that blathers on about my kids all the time. So I just write about them some of the time.
Jewish Education is a big part of my life, and while I do love to write about that, I also frequently refrain, as we learn in Pirkei Avot 5:9 "wise people do not speak in the presence of those who are wiser than they are." There is always someone out there who can more deftly interpret the Torah portion or the political climate in Israel much better than I can.
I feel compelled to write sometimes, and the words begin to jump from my fingers, the sentences start forming in my head before I can even get to the computer. Scraps of paper or the iPhone "notes" app become a sorting station for ideas, some that never come to fruition, and some that practically write themselves.
Lately the blog posts are self-contained stories. It feels good to get those out. Like I can stop trying to hold on to those details now. Some stories can never be written, not unless I start a new blog under a pseudonym. (Those are some good stories too.)
What has surprised me about this randomly-spaced-in-time, usually cathartic blog even more than the writing, is the readers. The fact that people are reading this in the Ukraine, Russia, Venezuela, and just today, Greece, India, China, Brazil, Israel and Serbia. Wow. That's just mind-blowing. Thanks to Google translator, someone a world away has just read my extremely personal and emotional cancer survival story. I hope it gave that person some comfort.
I sometimes wonder if someone somewhere who was just really looking for a good picture of New Jersey tomatoes, or maybe just some porn, happened along this blog and I challenged their thinking, or at least gave them a smile before they moved on with their images search and found what they were really looking for.
The funny thing is that these strangers out there know the story of how I made cocktail hour for my dad, and how a tree fell on my house. They read about my passion for Furthur and my love of my kids, and many more tidbits as well. But my own family won't read the blog!
Dad: "Jewel, I have no need to read how many times you walked your dogs and what you are wearing every day."So, where were we?
Me: "Dad, that's not what I write about in my blog."
Dad: "Jewel, that's what a blog is. It's all about fashion and shoes."
Me: "Dad, that's not what MY blog is."
Dad: "I'm not reading your blog or anyone's blog."
I try very hard after I "birth" each one not to say this sentence:
"So did you read my blog yet?"
That even sounds annoying to me. But I really love the feedback when I finally do get it, even when its anonymous. One friend sent me a book on writing the personal narrative. I hope he will notice my style improving!
Just yesterday, when I was at the doctor, one of his partners showed me a huge framed photo of Jerry Garcia on the wall and said, "I read your blog, it was great." We bonded over tales of shared concerts before his next patient and my own appointment.
Who knows what I'll write about next? My two most hit upon entries were The Letter to Chris Christie (regarding Same Sex Marriage) and Let There Be Songs To Fill The Air (a love letter to the Grateful Dead). I don't know why, but these keep getting hits, and search engines keep finding them. By the way, Chris Christie wrote back to me, and the Wheel keep turning for us Deadheads, so there will be a lot more to write on both topics. Another that gets a lot of hits was a heartfelt letter to my college roommate who died too young. I guess a lot of people can relate to losing a friend before their time.
So, I will keep writing when I have something to say, and I thank you for reading.
It continues to be a long strange trip, I see no reason why I'd run out of adventures and ideas now.